Sunday

I just got back from my parent's house. I was there just briefly. I wanted to stay longer, but they were busy. My stepdad helped me tighten one of my radiator hoses because anti-freeze was leaking out. I also picked up a mountain bike while I was there, and inflated the tires. I intend to start taking short rides starting tomorrow, and working myself into a regiment. Hopefully this week, my mom will also have some BPO's for me to help her with. So, there's that.

I heard from "J" last night, and briefly again this morning. I attempted to strike up a dialogue and sent her a YouTube video I thought she might like. She certainly seems very distant, and very reluctant to talk at all. And its hard to read her tone. I don't know how to feel about it. I am grateful to talk to her at all though.

I want so bad to be hugged. I want so bad to be loved. I want so bad to hug. I want so bad to love. I want so bad to give. I want so bad to make a difference in a special girl's life; to make her happy, to be someone she can depend on and trust anytime, anywhere. I long so bad for her sweet lips against mine again.

I don't want to feel this way anymore.