Missed.

Come one, come all

You're invited to the party

But please don't shove

Let everyone bare witness

The warrant's signed and the ending looms

Come one, come all

The spectacle's just starting

With zero shits given

I'm watching my own ending

It feels so freeing to watch it all crash and burn

Is it over yet? 

Can I wake up yet?

I payed all my debts

Left with countless regrets 

Come one, come all

Relish in all of my failures 

The glowing girl you knew

Has broken down into nothing

As you are so was I--but that bridge has burned

Is it over yet? 

Is this over yet? 

There is nothing left

Except regrets

A happy girl once was here

I miss myself. I miss myself.

There was so much more to do

I miss myself. I miss myself.

Must it end this way? 

I miss myself. I miss myself.

I was almost there

I miss myself. I miss myself!!

New and Improved

Hi, I'm the new Rachel. New and improved. I'll be taking over from here.

My New Beginning

I'm ready now. I want to be Rachel again. 

heh.

Wow, I fucked up already. How typical. Let's try again. 

The new new me..

Today I stop. Today a new chapter in Rachel's story begins. I will no longer do the bad thing. As of now, it is officially behind me. No excuses, no fall backs. It stops now--the goodness and the healing begins now. 

Sepsis

I've stopped breathing

My time is fleeting

I've grown so weak

I can barely speak

I tried my best and I gave it all

But pride always goes first right first before the fall

So there's nothing more for me to believe

Torture inherently and deceitfully received

Time when pressed just causes distress

I'm turning off all the lights this time

Fuckin' blank canvas wishing to become nothing

It pushes back with each brushstroke wanting bad for me to choke

No hope and I'm done

Nothing left for you to do but face toward the sun and run

All I've done I've lived to regret

And this it

So how the fuck am I not dead yet?

Vomit-inducing as the sounds remind

I'm turning off all the fuckin' lights this time

No!

Nothing more for me--turn off the lights this time

Nothing more for me--turn off the lights this time

Nothing more for me--turn off the lights this time

Nothing more for me--turn off the lights this time

I've stopped breathing

My time is fleeting

I've grown so weak

I can barely speak

I tried my best and I gave it all

But I can't do it no more

Because I have nothing in store

The hour is late when you hear all the screaming

A blessing of sepsis to remove the demeaning

Why am I here?

It was never clear

Bet your fuckin' ass I'm turning off the lights this time

Fuckless

Yes, I'm that cunt that whines and whines
Bitches that she's fat before she even dines
Grew up sheltered by garbled nerves

Yes, I am prone to these fits of rage
Cursed before I even knew my age
Sleepless and clawing at the walls all night

I no longer give a fuck
I'm driving off the cliff
And I have no desire to say goodbye so fuck it

Yes, I'm that girl you avoid in school
And I am the result of obeying rules
And if I could do it over I'd just whine

Yes, I know there's no hope for me
And I don't care enough to beg or plead
I have no fucks left to give away

I no longer give a fuck
I'm driving off the cliff
And I have no desire to say goodbye so fuck it

I no longer give a fuck
I'm driving off the cliff
And I have no desire to say goodbye so fuck it

Fuckless

I no longer give a fuck
I'm driving off the cliff
And I have no desire to say goodbye so fuck it

I no longer give a fuck
I'm driving off the cliff
And I have no desire to say goodbye so fuck it

Fuckless