GOALS

Goals for this coming week:

1) Apply for work (several different jobs)

2) Use rowing machine and get a real routine started

3) Continue reading "11/22/63" by Stephen King

4) Work on writing

5) Work on drawing

6) Study odds for lottery and Kentucky Derby

i have been in a serious rut for what feels like an eternity now, and my depression is worsening. As my inactivity and laziness makes me feel more and more worthless, I realize only I can change my situation. If I do just a little bit of all these things a little bit each day, and a little more and more each day as time goes on, I will feel gratified with myself, I will feel productive, and it will become normal. I must do this, and I must do it this week. And I will. 

No more laying in bed all day feeling sorry for myself. 

For You

We've touched on the feelings

But not on the reasons

When it comes to my fall

I'll reveal my all

You take me to that place

I always believed was a LIE

Smoke's still settling

Not used to believing

And knowing I'm not dreaming

Because you are my world

For you, I'd fall on my sword

The darkest of my secrets

Uncloaked while my soul is in audit

Leaving myself disarmed

I urge you to climb into my arms

Years of searching empty space

I've waited for you all my LIFE

No longer pretending

And finally breathing

No longer veiling

Because you are my world

For you I'd fall on my sword

I never thought,,I  would share this amour

And I never thought,,the sun could rise once more!

Never believed in sequels

And up to now in equals

Disillusionment met its match

For you, I'd kill or die

For this first time there is nothing

In this world I wouldn't fuckin' TRY

To keep you for all time

Until I die

Until I die

Until I am dying

To keep you for all time.