All I Want

I just want to start this post by saying to my readers that everything is okay and I feel fine. My previous post was simply just poetry--something I often post to this blog. All is well and I have inflicted no harm to myself nor have I even toyed with the idea. I was just playing around with FL Studio as I often do, the creative juices were flowing and some lyric ideas came to mind; so I documented them for reference--as I often do.

Things are continuing to go very well in many aspects of my life, and it's been a good summer so far. I've got a new(er) car, I've had the same job for almost a year, I'm healthier, I'm happy and even-tempered, I'm more focused than I have ever been, school's going well, I've built a routine for myself and I have eliminated and changed all of my old habits. If she could only see me now, I know she'd be so proud. I want so badly to talk to her and I know all I have to do is text her and say "hi," but as I have said before, it's just not that easy for me (for obvious reasons). But even more-so, I want to see her face again. I want to hug her and softly kiss her on the forehead. I want to hold her hand again. I want to treat her to a fancy dinner and movie, I want to take her for a stroll on the beach hand-in-hand, I want to cuddle with her on the couch and watch the newest Iliza Shlesinger comedy special that continues to haunt my Netlifx queue, but I refuse to interfere in her life by asking.

I want her to be happy, and I know she is. I can only hope one day she will welcome the chance  for me to display and prove all I've learned and changed over these past 10 months since we last saw each other. The fact of the matter for me continues to be that no matter what I have going on, no matter who I meet, no matter what--there's nothing and no one that can take her place. She continues to be all I want.