8 Years In Hell And I'm Just About Ready To Leave

I've been sitting in my dark and dreary room all day listening to "Narcissistic Cannibal" over and over probably close to 60 times, while contemplating my pathetic little microcosm that I incidentally fashioned for myself, and this lyrical tangent came out of my head: Enjoy.. or don't..

Don't want to live this life alone - Don't want to become a sad and soulless drone
I want to look back and just fucking laugh - Never have to relive this gargantuan fucking mess
I knew the whole time I was straying from the path - Fucked around and allowed my time to pass
Now all I have is this basket of regret...

The clouds that formed - Followed my course
This scenery reminds me of all that's been left behind
I have tried to push on through - And all I've got is all I've proved
Burdening me until the end of this life

I'm the pessimist that you all have locked away - Accidentally over extended my stay
No one gives a fuck if I live or die - It's like a high to sit in the dark and cry
I've surrendered all my bridges and levees - Allowed myself to give up on me
Now I play chess with a demon I haven't met...

The clouds that formed - Followed my course

This scenery reminds me of all that's been left behind

I have tried to push on through - And all I've got is all I've proved
Burdening me until the end of this life

Paint me a picture I can never even fathom - Thinking there's an option when in fact there isn't one
Growing old in the darkness I create - Dreary thoughts bringing on even gloomier days
What I would give for the love of a mother - What I'd do to talk once more to my father
The ending is nearing - my time disappearing

All I know how to do is act in wrath...
In a confusing world whose logic I couldn't grasp...

Now all I have is this basket of regret... (3x)

I'll never be what I wanted to be...
Allowing the demons to have the best of me!